For your info, our veterinarian told us to check his shit now and then, so go ahead with your stupid call to PETA.
No, I've never been fucked in the ass by anything, much less a splintered 2x4, but I suspect you might be experienced in that department. If not, go ahead and try it. You'll probably like it.
As far as me possibly being a fag, BWAHAHAHAHAHA! I've got a loving wife and have fathered a beautiful little girl.
<sigh> So much for your pathetic attempt at being mildly entertaining. I hope you can cope with your failure, dickhead, oops, I mean shitstain.
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