God has chosen the foolish things of this world to confound the wise.

Reason all you want but you will never, even if you had a trillion years understand a being that is infinite, omnipotent, omniscient, omnipresent. ect.

You sir are merely one of his creatons, so as smart or logical as you might think you are and try all you want I doubt any answer I could give would be accepted by you. I doubt anything I could possibly say or do would ever change your mind so I am not trying, don't ask me, I am not God, I just know him.....know that I know that I know in a way I couldn't possible help you understand unless you also met him in the way I did and so many others have.

All I get is for you to read, if you ever read a bible the ending part of the book of Job where God talks to him and basically tells Job what I would tell you.