Joe's Garage ACT I

THE CENTRAL SCRUTINIZER


Desperate nerds in high offices all over the world have been
known to
enact the most disgusting pieces of legislation in order to win
votes
(or, in places where they don't get to vote, to control unwanted
forms of
mass behavior).
Environmental laws were not passed to protect our air and
water...
they were passed to get votes. Seasonal anti-smut campaigns are
not
conducted to rid our communities of moral rot...they are
conducted to give
an aura of saintliness to the office-seekers who demand them. If
a few
key phrases are thrown into any speech (as the expert advisors
explain to
these various heads of state) votes will roll in, bucks will
roll in, and, most
importantly, power will be maintained by the groovy guy (or gal)
who gets
the most media coverage for his sleaze. Naturally, his friends
in various
businesses will do okay too.
All governments perpetuate themselves through the daily
commission of act
which a rational person might find to be stupid or dangerous (or
both). Naturally,
our government is no exception... for instance, if the President
(any one of them)
went on TV and sat there with the flag in the background (or
maybe a rustic
scene on a little backdrop, plus the flag) and stared sincerely
into the camera
and told everybody that all energy problems and all inflationary
problems had been
traced to and could be solved by the abolition of MUSIC, chances
are that most
people would believe him and think that the illegalization of
this obnoxious form of
noise pollution would be a small price to pay for the chance to
buy gas like the good
ol' days. No way? Never happen? Records are made out of oil. All
those big rock
shows go from town to town in fuel-gobbling 45 foot trucks...and
when they get there,
they use up enormous amounts of electrical energy with their
lights, their amplifiers,
their PA systems...their smoke machines. And all those
synthesizers...look at all
the plastic they got in 'em...and the guitar picks...you name
it...
JOE'S GARAGE is a stupid story about how the government is going
to try to do away
with music (a prime cause of unwanted mass behavior! It's sort
of like a really cheap
kind of high school play...the way it might have been done 20
years ago, with all the sets
made out of cardboard boxes and poster paint. It's also like
those lectures that local
narks used to give (where they show you a display of all the
different ways you can get
wasted, with the pills leading to the weed leading to the
needle, etc., etc.).
If the plot of the story seems just a little bit preposterous,
and if the idea of The Central
Scrutinizer enforcing laws that haven't been passed yet makes
you giggle, just be glad
you don't live in one of the cheerful little countries where, at
this very moment, music is
either severely restricted...or, as it is in Iran, totally
illegal.

SEGUES TO "THE CENTRAL SCRUTINIZER"......

The rest is best summarized at Wikipedia:

[en.wikipedia.org]